Homage to my travelling companions

A great number of years ago, my then-job largely involved trying to explain to customers on the other side of the world that they would in fact have to actually pay for the goods they had ordered.  In French. Oui. 

One of my lasting memories was attending an assertiveness training course, during which I learnt that one could come across more assertive when speaking on the phone standing up.  At the time, getting out of my seat for heated discussions about credit extensions whilst desperately flicking through the Business French Dictionary was pretty much my only form of exercise.

Whilst my desk neighbour Amy enjoyed my wild gesticulating against the receiver, I felt I very much had my own back when laughing at her account of trying to ride a bike after years of abandoning it in the garage.  Her story of getting out of breath and aching legs the next day assured me that this would be her one and only escapade into the world of sports. Surely it wouldn't be long until we next overate on pizza to the point of feeling sick, only to suddenly feel revived at the thought of chocolate ice cream?

I couldn't have been more wrong.  Instead of giving up after one attempt, like I would have done, Amy started an entire programme of getting her fitness levels up.  Not long after that, she started blogging as a "This girl can" ambassador... you can read more about it here.

There are many things that I admire about Amy, but the thing that is most inspiring to me is that she was bad at stuff - but kept going.  She went running, and would tell me about it the next day, laughing at how much she struggled to get to the end of her road. She would drag me along to stuff like bounce classes (I alluded to them here), and tell me that it was really hard but that I should definitely try it.

I don't mean to say that she was particularly bad at sports (maybe I should just stop digging...), I guess it was just news to me that people weren't either really sporty, or really not.  Amy showed me that - by sticking with something - you can become good at it. Nowadays, I'm not sure if I'm more inspired by the fact that she has her own personal gym in her garden, or that she cycles to work through crazy London streets.  Not because it was easy and just "kind of happened", but because she just kept going with something she wanted to do, until it was her new normal.

In a similar way, I have been inspired by my husband.  Despite not being keen on heights, he did agree to accompany me to the climbing hall for this blog post.  I'll be honest, I was surprised - I know he usually allows my crazy, mountain climbing, high tower scaling family to drag him along to lofty heights outside his comfort zone. But I didn't expect him to agree willingly to scramble up fake boulders, just so that I can write about it.  The fact that he has now bought his second loyalty pass (and the shoes... and the chalk bag... and watches ALL the YouTube videos...) belies his discomfort.  However, rather than letting that stop him, he has decided to just keep going with it.

And there are many, many more such stories, of the friends who did Couch to 5k after nightfall so that they couldn't been seen struggling along the road, to those who volunteer at sporting events despite injuries to keep a foot in the door.  Those who struggle at the back of the group / class / room, but don't give up after one tough session that might have left them believing it was just beyond them. 

I'm not quite that brave.  I had known for a long a time that things had to change, but I was simply too embarrassed to actually do something about it.  Going to the gym, seeing myself in a mirror, knowing that other people could see me being bad at stuff?  Why would I do that to myself? And so, to the rescue, as always, came the TV.

That's right - on the days when I simply could (and can) not deal with the embarrassment of being me, I'd YouTube exercise clips.  Ideally with the big curtains closed, when Matthew is out, and only choosing the videos with titles such as "super easy for the unfittest beginners EVER with no actual work involved". But I do them. (Since the embarrassing /  uncomfortable carpet burn experience, I do also use a mat, thank you for asking.)

After a while I realised that I needed something slightly more progressive to ensure that I keep pushing myself, and I downloaded an App that would encourage me to spend a few minutes daily getting sweaty.

My first attempt was the "7 minute workout App".  That worked quite well for me initially, but the difficulty levels increased steeply and I lost interest when I had to skip most exercises because they were beyond me.  I have since changed to the "Female Fitness" App - this too is getting more challenging as time progresses, but at a rate that I can keep up with.  Both Apps rely on body weight exercises such as crunches, squats, jumping jacks... Initially I used to put them on as soon as I got in from work, but I found that all too often I had an excuse.  It was later than expected, I should really pop to the shop for dinner, I just want to put on my pjs... I realised that - if I wanted to stick with it - I'd have to create a routine that would enable me.  For me, this now means getting up 20 minutes earlier in the morning.  In return I feel justified to be in bed by 9pm. Win!

Are there any benefits to exercising at home?

1. Massively! The main one for me is that it removes my key barriers - shame & embarrassment. 

2.It's free...

3. It's the most flexible thing to do - no matter the time, weather, what you're wearing... and you can be super creative with it.  We've bought some weights and a jumping rope, so that those minutes wasted staring at the boiling kettle can be used to get our heart rate up. Running up the stairs, doing squats when brushing my teeth, planks during adverts (well.. one advert) - small things that don't impact on your day, and no-one needs to know. 

4. There is an unlimited variety of intensity levels on offer, as well as a broad range of types of exercises.  Want to focus on your arms, or is developing your core the goal?  There will be something tailor-made for you online.  Just look for it.  I have a vague recollection of practising Salsa steps guided by YouTube, there really are no limits.

5.  You're in control.  There are days where I simply can't complete the entire video.  So I just press pause, have a drink, give myself a talking to... all without anyone else having to get involved and possibly judging me. 

6. For me, this was a stepping stone.  Sure, I still use the app and there are still weeks where working out at home is the only thing I do.  But to me, knowing that I was able to complete a 20 minute video, has helped me to have confidence to attempt a lesson.  More than just building my resilience and strength, working out at home has build my courage to exercise in ways and places where people could see me.  I still don't like it - but I know I can do it. 

Taking more chances by dancing more dances

"Are you here for the tap dancing?" I shouted through the pouring rain at the Lady who was very clearly not dressed for dancing.

Awkwardly squeezing out of my car in the tight car park, I realised that shouting random stuff at strangers in abandoned primary schools was not the done thing.  I put on my best winning smile, which I'm sure really put her at ease.

"I don't think so - I'm here for the PTA Meeting", the Lady replied, rushing determinedly towards the front door.  I followed her in the least creepy way possible when wearing leggings and brogues.   Once inside, I found my way through the PTA meeting to the sports hall -  the large, empty, dark sports hall with definitely no tapping or dancing happening.

Sitting on a bench, I debated how long I'd have to wait until I could legitimately write a blog about trying my very best to dance, and how it this clearly had been prevent by a power completely out of my control. 

I also made sure to use my time wisely; evidence that I was there.

Just as I started to think that it would be socially acceptable to leave, Chantell arrived.  Laden with a massive speaker, a number of mats and a huge bag, I have a slight suspicion that she did not expect to see me sitting there in the dark.  Why would she - unlike with all my other sporty adventures, I had not contacted her in advance, but just follow a recommendation  and a quick google search.

Her slight look of panic when I explained that I just wanted to join in (no, I have no previous experience.  Ballet? Err, no, never. No, really, I can't dance...) gave me a clue that perhaps I should have let her know that I was panning to randomly turn up on this rainy Monday.  The group had been working on a dance routine, which I had no chance of picking up. As one by one the Ladies of the group arrived, I became more and more at peace with the idea of sitting down and watching the pros. Let's face it, I'm always at peace with the idea of sitting down.

Chantell however had other ideas. "We'll work on technique instead, it will do us all good", she declared.  Technique sounds very much like squats to me.  I felt like the kid who hadn't done her homework, which lead to the entire class having to stay behind at break. But I was completely wrong - Chantell magically wove technique work into creating a brand new routine that I was able to follow. To a background of Eliza Doolittle, what's not to love?

After a while it became clear that my work shoes were really not at all suitable, and I thought the moment had finally come where I'd be ask to sit out and let the pros do their work.  (Also, I was really ready for a break). But nope, still no sitting down for me.

What followed was an amusing interval of various Ladies swapping shoes with the only aim of finding one pair that might fit me.  May I use the opportunity to thank these amazing Ladies for their kindness.  On this journey through the alphabet of sports' I have encountered some of the kindest, funniest, most welcoming people.  But giving your very own, very personal dancing shoes to a sweaty paws like me, just so that I could join in and feel part of it.. thank you!

I had too much fun to think about taking pictures - this one was sneakily captured at the end.  I wish I could have captured the energy, the sound and the precision for you.

Of course, just putting on a Cinderella slipper did not make me Fred Astaire, but neither did I fall over my own feet.  Naturally I messed up all the steps and forgot to count and couldn't shuffle with my left leg (or any leg, for that matter). BUT I wasn't absolutely terribly the worst person ever.  And I don't say that very often.

This was largely due to the time the Ladies took to make sure I had the chance to learn the steps properly.  Sometimes (always), that involved going over the same bit again and again, and breaking down elaborate sequences into bite-size steps. 

So should you dance your way back into exercise?

1. Absolutely yes!  But maybe check if the lesson is suitable for beginners, or at least pre-warn them of your intentions.

2. Be prepared to sweat.  Buckets.  I was prepared to find it hard, to feel awkward, to not get it, fall over... I was not prepared to struggle for breath and perspire quite as much.

3. Wear comfortable clothing - I guess that goes without saying.  Oh, and if your dance of choice is tap, don't believe google when he says that Brogues will do for beginners.  They will not. 

4.  Compared to other classes I have tried, it had been more difficult to find a class I could just pop along - on the other hand, dancing is really such a wide open field that I'm sure there'd be a style (and nearby class) for everyone.

5. Like with a lot of the other activities I have given a go, it's clear hat you can't learn it in one lesson.  I guess the good thing about tap is that I can practice it at home, on my own, and build confidence before the next class. 

6.  Whilst of course physical activity was the key driver behind me attending this class, I also really enjoyed all the other aspects of dancing. The music, the rhythm, the "desperately trying to remember which step comes next", the counting, the fitting in with the group... I returned home physically and mentally tired from trying to take it all in.

Will there be a next class?  Well... I'm buying the shoes!  And if you wonder what my best husband has to say about the footwear expense, I'd just like to update you on his latest hobby.  Since he'd kindly come along to support me with climbing, he's bough the shoes, the chalk bag and the loyalty discount card. U-hu.